Accepting Change (or I'm not God!)

Change happens.  You can't stop it, and you can't deny it.  Trying to stop it will frustrate and exhaust you.  Denying it will just leave you in confusion.  What happened a minute ago will never happen the exact same way.  It can be repeated but never duplicated identically.  The variables are such that only the God of the Universe can fathom the calculations.

This same God knows the end from the beginning.  He knows that the old things must pass away in order for the new to come.  In our humanity we fear.  We fear what we cannot control, but the joke is on us because we were never in control to begin with.  Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us to "lean not on our own understanding", but to "trust Him with ALL THINE HEART", and "acknowledge Him" in all our ways.  Trusting Him means getting out of our own heads, and letting Him be the one to move us, guide us, hold us in place or pull us out of the way.

Our humanity makes us flawed and prone to get it wrong, all-of-it WRONG! But God, the Lord and Savior of all who choose to submit to Him, has NEVER GOTTEN IT WRONG.  He is not dismayed by what is happening, and we shouldn't be either.  I am not ashamed of The Gospel, nor am I in fear of what lies ahead.  I know it isn't easy to accept or to wrap our minds around, but that is exactly why we have to give Him our heart because it's too much for our mind.  If we could reason it all out with our minds, then we (you or I) would be God.  Last time I checked I am not.  How 'bout you?

Stephanie Hart

Be Prepared!

All about are the weights and straining of the world and the world’s system and worldly thought processes.  They are evil and deadly.  We are not supposed to be conformed to the things of this world, but transformed by the renewing of our mind.

I have always enjoyed learning and delving into a deeper understanding of the word.  I appreciate the revelation, which I believe has been given to me by the Lord through His Holy Spirit.  I have found myself recently hearing conspiracy and revolution in the words of those who are supposed to be smart “God fearing” people.  I have read Internet commentary on groups who’s existence, if true, completely destroys the foundation and understanding of who we are (Patriots and Christians).

In the days that Jesus walked on the earth, there were Pharisees, Seduces, Zealots, Essenes, “common” folks, mixed-breeds, and strangers. Out of each of these groups came followers of Christ, those who wanted more than what this world had to offer.  Some thought that Jesus was a revolutionary and would rise up in the natural realm and over-throw all the factions who ruled with evil hearts.  All were scattered when he took on the cross, and for some hope was irreversibly lost.  Jesus did not take on the Cross at Calvary.  He took it on the moment he stepped out of heaven and allowed himself to be placed in the “ark” of Mary’s womb.  Breaking forth out of the tomb on the 3^rd day was not a tremendous feet for our Lord.  HE IS GOD!!!

I recently spent several evenings listening to the conspiratorial commentary of a man of faith.  Each night I listened and asked questions.  I find it very easy to “ooo” and “ah”, and to get caught up in some of the information.  However, I find when I have come away (minutes, hours, days) later with feelings of disenchantment and fear.  This is not good.  The word says there will be wars and rumors of wars. There will be things done in the last days that will even deceive the elite.  It says a wicked and perverse generation seeks after a sign and wonder.

I am not a revolutionary, I am a Christian.  I am a believer in Pentecost, not the pentagon.  I believe that we as Christians, the Israeli people and even perhaps Muslims, though the latter two are not believers in Jesus as the Messiah, will be persecuted and could even die for their beliefs.  Anyone considered divisive toward the One World Government and its One World Religion will be considered a threat.

My hope is (like the early believers in Jesus while he walked the earth) that his second coming will rescue us from the wiles and dangers of the enemy.  Jesus will appear and catch away all those whose hearts are waiting.  I want to see my Jesus while I am still living, and with my family be taken home to heaven.  However, it is possible that the world could become a much more horrible place than we know it as today before that happens.  The collapse of the economic system and position of those in power make it possible to steal our very freedom, enslave, torture and murder those who will not conform to the things of this world.  This is biblically a definite possibility.

It doesn’t matter to me who the giants in the land are.  Just as God promised to drive out the inhabitants of the land as his children took it over, so I believe he will go before those who truly believe in Him and put them in the place He has ordained and carved out for us.  If  Jesus tarries will we be a Shadrack, Meshach, or Abednego who were cast (walking of their own free will) into the fiery furnace; Daniel cast into the lion’s den (because he chose not to conform to the law of the land, but that of the God of Israel); or Joseph sold into slavery by his own brothers (because he allowed himself to be different), all of which survived their persecution and became victorious because of their faith.

Should we revolt? Only if you’ve been called like Moses or John the Baptizer, and even then they did only as much as God would allow with humble and meek hearts.  Should we flee?  Only if you want to make things harder for yourself, like Jonah.  What should we do?  Be prepared.  Jesus told us that by worrying we could not gain, and the psalms (written by a man who was in constant struggle) tell us to not fret.  Know God, and let him know you, and you’ll find peace no matter the situation.  Know your word, which is the very essence of God.  Be prepared.

 Stephanie Hart

No Excuse

You may not know me or anything about me.   I really don’t care if you know me or not.  I want you to know the one who saved my life.  You might ask, “Why?”  “What do I need him for?”  Or maybe, you think that you have done such horrible things or that such horrible things have been done to you that He couldn’t possible love you or want you.

Well, I can tell you that that is just not true.  I was the victim of sexual molestation as a little girl.  Not by one perpetrator, but two.  One was by a family member over a period of time, the other a one time occurrence by someone I didn’t really know.  I suffered emotional and physical abuse, by peers and one of my family members. I have been beaten by someone I loved.  I have been refused tenderness, and given subjection.

In response, I did it all.  Drugs.  Alcohol.  Sex.  Self-Mutilation.  I even attempted suicide twice.  Some of the things I did and tried are so vile (to me) that I cannot print them.  I HATED myself.  I struggled with anger, depression, and a sense of desperate worthlessness.

But...Jesus saved my life.

I was so messed-up that I had to and still have to keep coming to Him.  I have come to him so empty and broken that I lost my ability to breath, because the hurt was so strong.

Biblically, in some instances the word for salvation and the word for deliverance are interchangeable.  No matter which you need He can do both.  Is it easy?  No, it is the hardest thing you will ever do.  I thought if I laid down my pain, my abuses, “who will I be?”

I couldn’t imagine then that today I would be able to tell you this and be glad that I can.  I am not in pain anymore.  I am not desperate or alone.  He has called me His own and He will do the same for you.  If you know Jesus as Savior, let me remind you to rejoice in your trial, tribulation and testimony.

However, if YOU have ever thought, “I am just a speck, why would He even care?”  If YOU have ever thought, “I don’t need Him.”  “I can do it by myself.”  I’m a survivor, because I survive everything.”  Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you are unworthy of REAL LOVE.

Say this with me (YOU have nothing to lose and every thing to gain):

             Jesus, I don’t know you, but I am willing to reach out.  Please reach back to me.  Jesus, please come into my heart and forgive me of all my mistakes, all the sins I have committed against you, myself and others. Help me to forgive those who have sinned against me. I want to know real love. Show me Your love. Show me Your peace. Save my life. Thank you.

If you said this prayer, I am so excited for you.  Now continue to talk to Him and begin to look for Him moving in your life.  You need to get a bible and ask God to lead you in reading His word.  If you don’t have a bible, there are plenty of websites online.  I have heard other ministers say to read John (the 4^th book in the New Testament).  It is a good place to start your walk with the Lord.  Welcome to YOUR NEW LIFE.

Back On Track

“Adversity” was the title of my last blog, several months ago. Little did I know the prophecy of my own words. God is faithful, and I have endured.

I can say that it matters not the trial of your faith, but that you maintain faith through the trial. It matters not the pain you must endure, but only that you do endure. It matters not what you are losing or laying down for the sake of following Christ, but that you realize that laying it down is the only way to follow him.

I have so much to learn and do in preparation for what God has called me to do. I am not ready, but I know that it is time to “Go!” I can hear Him calling me everyday. Where? When? How? I don’t know, but He does. So I will walk in the steps ordered by Him and Him alone. Not the ways of man, or my own flesh.

However, as I learned the other night, I must make sure to stay “well oiled” or all that I do will be in vain. I don’t just want to talk people about Jesus, but I personally need to continue to experience him for myself. “In His Presence is fullness of Joy”, and it is so true. Without the presence of God, I know for a fact that it takes no time at all to get dry and brittle. Soaking, basking, dwelling in His Presence, is the only way to endure.

Doing this will cause us to deal with the fact that we 1) can’t do it alone, 2) weren’t meant to do it alone, and 3) go to the Only One who can get us through. I am so glad that He is faithful to bring us through. 1 & 2 equals a broken and contrite spirit; 3 is Him not denying us.

I also don’t want to just talk to others about Jesus, but I want to introduce them to the one who saved my life. I want them to be free. I want God to talk to them. I want the Holy Spirit to so totally invade the conversation or meeting than lives are changed/transformed.

“Lord, I know that without you I can do nothing. Thank you for bringing me through the last year and upholding me when I thought my foot was about to slip. I know that I have done nothing to deserve your love and grace, but I am your daughter and your servant and I love you so much. Lord, it is not just our relationship, but you desire what we have with everyone.”

Adversity

I’m sure this has been said many times, but it bears repeating. In times of adversity we find out who we truly are in The Lord.

For those of us who claim Jesus as our Lord and Savior trials and testing are important barometers for how closely we are being discipled by Him. When the trials come do we murmur and complain? Do we cry like big babies having an adult size tantrum? “Why me Lord?”

Or, do we embrace the challenge? Do we ask The Lord for strength and revelation so that we can move on? And what if the challenge doesn’t just lift when we believe we are doing all the right things and not complaining? How do we handle ourselves when our difficult situations seem to linger without the evidence of closure?

I have reacted with grace and maturity in some situations, and others have taken me some time to “grow” through. But that’s what it’s all about; it’s about The Father God helping us to grow up so that He can use us. If we always react to adversity like little babies, then He will never be able to use us for His Glory.

We should have the faith of a child, which means we believe He will take care of us and will always be there for us. Like a little child trusts and believes that there will be food to eat, clothes to wear, and someone to kiss his “boo-boo’s”. Knowing that they are loved no matter what.

Regardless of the severity of the trial or how we feel, God is GOOD! He loves us and will always be there for us. He is not like us, because He loves unconditionally and sent His son, Jesus, so all would be saved. All delivered.

“Lord, I trust you by faith. I know you saved me and rescued me, and whatever the outcome of the situation You have not left me. You hold me closer now than ever before. Thank You Lord for everything.”

He Set Me FREE

Tonight is a mile marker for me. 15 years ago my life was radically changed. I was so very lost, and that night I found my savior, Jesus.

I had been to the alter many times and attended church off and on over the first 25 years of my life. However, there was never relationship there. No life.

Up to the moment 15 years ago, I had only two significant encounters with God that I can remember. The first encounter was my first trip to the alter. I was about 5 or 6 years old. My mom had sent me to church on the bus that came around on Sundays. It was there at First Church of The Nazarene, I gave my heart to God. Unfortunately, mine was not a christian home, so the only spiritual teaching I got came from attending FCTN & other churches with a similar bus ministry.

The second real encounter I had with God was when I returned home and started going back to church about 3 months pregnant at the age of 24. I went to the alter in a First Baptist Church I had attended briefly, before running face first back to a life of sin and depravity. I don't remember the sermon, but I know I was desperate for God to help me.

Though it was a step to a normal alter/platform, I wept almost uncontrollably at the feet of Jesus. Not just metaphorically. I could see him for the first time. He was hanging on the cross above me, drenched in blood, and looking down at me. He was not angry or in pain. He looked at me with love and compassion. He just loved me from there. I can still see him, and no movie can capture that image.

Just a few months later, I was a new mom. Frightened and still very lost, I returned to the alter at a revival meeting the week of Mardi Gras, 1995. I said the sinners prayers again and this time something happened. I followed the crowd to a room where people talk and pray for you individually. I was told some months later that it was as though I was in a box, and couldn't see my way out.

God is not in a box. At one time He allowed Himself to inhabit The Temple and the Ark of the Covenant, but He does not LIVE in our parameters. He did not crawl into my smallness and fear, but held out His hand and led me out of confusion and misery. Because of His extraordinary love for me, my life was not only saved, but transformed.

Jesus saved my life. He continues to deliver and set me free and I can't imagine what my life would be without Him.

"Thank You Lord for saving my soul. Thank You Lord for making me whole. Thank You Lord for giving to me, my life abundant so rich and FREE!"

A Simple Prayer

Have you ever wanted to pour out your heart to God, only to find you were at a loss for words? There are times I want to just tell him...anything...everything, but all that will come out is "Thank You, Lord." I don't know if this is right, but it occurs to me that the word says to "Enter HIS gates with thanksgiving, and HIS courts with praise."

The gate in Old Testament times was considered the place of judgment. Those elevated to that position would be there to measure out the weightier matters. If this is the case and The Lord is our righteous judge, meaning HE alone doles out our righteousness as HE wills, than HIS judgment of our heart is what allows us to enter HIS gates.

The link I connected to is regarding Jewish prayer and how prayer is conducted. It mentions "kavanah" which in it's simplest form is acknowledging you are in The Lord's presence and of which "the minimal level of kavanah required is that 'one who prays must direct one's heart towards heaven.'" This may sound funny, but how often do we pray, or hear prayers that are just words and utterances without power or true direction. If I am not seeking the face of God and directing my heart to heaven than whatever I say, whatever I pray is all for not.

The word is clear that God, The Father, will judge us for the words we say. I may not consider myself to be a great prayer, but I know that when I do pray that I want HIM to judge it as truly directed toward HIM.

"Lord, Thank You. Thank You, Jesus, for saving me. Teaching me, Holy Spirit, and guiding me. Thank You for having faith in me. Without You, I would be lost. Thank You that my heart's desire is to be turned toward heaven and to hear Your voice and be in Your presence. To be used by You so that others can know You, and their hearts would be turned toward heaven."

In like a flood…Out comes a song

Isaiah 59:19 "So shall they fear the name of the LORD from the west, and his glory from the rising of the sun. When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the LORD shall lift up a standard against him." (italics are mine)

Recently I have experienced a flood of things happening in my life. Not just to me, but the people around me. I realize that we are supposed to endure hardship, it is what increases our faith. So I am grateful for what I have endured over the course of my life which has brought me to this place.

When I was very young, I was shown my most special gift. I can sing. Before I was saved I sang ok, and nobody went running away. But...since I have come to The Lord and sing to Him, it's so awesome. I sing, like some people drink or smoke (by the way...I did both and yesterday made 6 years since I had either). I am addicted to worship. This may sound odd, but I don't just sing to Him. He sings to me too.

I know. You might say, "That's great for you, but I can't carry a tune in a bucket." It's great for you too because God doesn't hear with ears like we do. He hears with His heart. "Sing unto the Lord a new song" and "Make a joyful NOISE unto The Lord with a VOICE OF TRIUMPH." These aren't just meant for the singers, they are meant for worshipers. Worshiping Him in "spirit and in truth" means you get it, it's by His Spirit and in His Truth.

This is the standard God is raising again and again. Though the flood of the enemy may come, I will PRAISE HIM, The God of Creation, The Prince of Peace for my life. I will worship HIM who picked me up from the miry clay, and THE ONE who sees me and loves me.

"Thank You LORD, that as I lift up my voice to you and humbly come before You in adoration for who You are, You will be there for me, and the enemy must flee. I don't have to fight or strain or fret. You are my strength and my song."

Great Expectations

My whole life I have had great expectations of others and how I think things should go. You know “My Way!!” However, most of the time this is not the situation and it usually leads me into feelings of disappointment and frustration, sometimes anger and depression.

It doesn’t have to be anything in particular. Usually, I think a scenario will have a certain result, and “wham-o”…I was wrong. I thought marriage would be different. I thought my relationship with my mom would be different. I thought God would “train me up in the way I should go” differently, and trust me there have been and will probably be many more.

Whew…these expectations are a killer. They almost killed my marriage and my relationship with my mom. Not to mention, anything God does will not match our thoughts, because His ways are higher than ours and His thoughts (well, need a I say more). I have spent many a day crying over unmet expectations.

I know I am not the only one who has these feelings, because these days lots of people are bombarded with the disappointment of their expectations not being met. I am learning though. I am learning to take all my unpleasant complaints of distrust and “Why God?”, and “I just don’t understand” to Him. I don’t always trust Him, so sometimes it takes a minute (or days, or weeks, or more…) to bring it back to Him and cast all my cares on Him. I do know the longer I wait, the harder it is. By the way, waiting years…eeks! BIG MISTAKE!!! God did heal me though. Thank you, Lord.

(Doing this blog can make me sound super spiritual, but for the most part I am just working out my salvation.)

“Lord, you know what’s in my heart, and how crushed I feel. You know how difficult this is for me. Please help me to get through this. Help me to be the person you want me to be. I choose to forgive. Help me to forgive.”

The Hard Road

This week I found myself in a bad place, doing the wrong thing. It was actually more of a position, and the thing I was doing was adding fuel to an already burning anger/frustration. The Word of God reads in Proverbs 18:21 "Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof."

The kind of seed a person plants (the words they speak) have a lot to do with the fruit they are partaking of. Words of wisdom are really God's word spoken gently and rationally. That is, they are rationed out so that one doesn't have too much or too little. This is done by the unction of the Holy Spirit. However, words spoken in haste are not clearly thought, but come from the place in the heart which has not been sanctified by God. It is the part of us we call our "flesh" and out of it's abundance can be hurtful speech, both for the speaker and the hearer.

Over the course of the last several days, I have spoken with wisdom, but also in haste. I was afforded an opportunity to speak my mind and share my heart in both wise and unwise ways. In the process I failed being true to no one, and now am feeling I lost the opportunity to strengthen and nurture important relationships. I cannot take back what I have said, but perhaps learn how to guard my mouth from supporting two opposing perspectives.

It was so easy to speak with haste and anger, but my desire is to take the much harder road and speak only with God's wisdom when prompted by Him to do so. For those who know me, I ask your forgiveness.

Sign of God

Have you ever driven down the same road about a zillion times and one day say, "Hey, when did they put up that sign?" Only to find out that the sign had been there forever. You just never saw it. Makes you think that maybe you weren't paying attention, but you know that you were.

Tonight, that happened to me. I have had a computer and internet for years, but only in the last few weeks have my eyes been opened. It's just like driving past the sign, it was there all along and I never noticed it.

I'm blogging. I never blogged before, hardly read other people's stuff and made a couple of comments. So, now, here I am, sending my thought out there for the whole world to see. And that's the point.

The Amazing God I serve is using His people after years of preparation. We've been here all along, but now it's time to be a "sign" for the world to see. The passersby in our life will be saying to themselves, "Where did that sign come from?" And we can gladly point to the Cross. Therefore, I blog now. I am now a "sign" God can use. Have you noticed any new "signs" in your life?

Beautiful things

This last week was so crazy. Everyday can be marked with something bad happening. Whenever I would share what was going on in my life, it just seemed unreal. The break-in, the break-downs, and the broken hearts left in the wake of a loved one's passing. I mean it was just so amazing. Not to mention the people of Haiti, who's lives have been so devastatingly altered.

However, and this may seem trite, I noticed a passage in Ecclesiastes that has kinda gripped me. I have heard the passage in Chapter 3 many times and know the song pretty well. "To every thing, turn, turn, turn. There is a season, turn ..." Anyway, you get it. If we will go past the parts everybody knows about a time for this and a time for that, there we will find in verse 11 "He hath made every thing beautiful in His time..."

What a good God we have that He takes the messed up, crazy things and makes them beautiful. Maybe it doesn't seem very terrific at the moment the world comes crashing down around us, but in the aftermath of our destruction and brokenness, if we allow Him, The Lord is there for us. Oh, what tremendous joy and peace can come from the worst of circumstances. Maybe it won't come immediately, but when it comes that is when God has made our "thing" beautiful.

Will A Man Rob GOD? (not a tithing message)

The other day my house was broken into. Several pieces of jewelry and a couple other things were taken. To the person(s) who perpetrated this crime, those items mean a few dollars and perhaps a quick thrill. However, for me, the worth of those items lies in their sentimental value.

A ring...given to me by my mother on the night of my wedding rehearsal. Special because she gave it to me and even more special because it was her mothers. A camera...bought specifically for our first family vacation (Orlando, Disney World), and now I have to buy a cheap throw away for my son's 1st basketball game. There are other disappointing feelings with similar memories, but the memories can never be stolen.

Yet...

How many times do we rob God of His greatest treasure? He paid the price for His son's death. Unable to look upon him as Jesus took upon the sins of the world. He suffers as we take, and take, and take with little regard for His, Our Father's, need. I've heard some preachers say things like: "God doesn't need us...our money...our time...our talent. It's all His." But if he didn't need us, why would he create us?

He created other things, angels and beasts (animals), but they don't have the ability to commune with God. He gave us the the ability to have a relationship with Him, and paid a hefty price for it. There is a song that goes, "He walks with me and He talks with me, and He tells me that I am His own..." That's what is robbed from Him everyday...relationship.

Don't rob God, because you are really only robbing yourself, and memories to treasure. Awesome, wonderful, eternal memories.